Mary Sue is a piece of cheese!
by rubbersoul1967
Summary: This is a spoof of the classic Mary Sue stories.Enjoy! I'll warn you that this is a weird one.


Mary Sue is a piece of cheese!

Disclaimer: I don't own anything. sob  
_Author's note: I wrote this a long time ago and rearranged the sentence structure to make this fanfic much more readable._

It all started one day when Quatre Rebarba Winner went shopping. He bumped into the most beautiful thing of all, a piece of cheese.

The heavenly scent hypnotized him it was imported from Wisconsin. He grabbed the cheese and put it into his shopping cart. He ran with the shopping cart and when it was fast enough he put both of his feet onto the cart and started gliding towards the cashier. The wind pounded on his face he smiled and smiled until he crashed into a display of Campbell's Soup.

He looked to his side and saw the cheese and he fell in love. The cheese had saved his life. (At least he thought so. Actually he did get hit by a couple of cans.) He walked up to the cashier and paid for the milk, the bread, the soda, the eggs, the cake, and the wonderful cheese. They were placed inside of a brown colored shopping bag with the store's label on it. He ran to his car trying to escape the rain, feeling stupid for not bringing an umbrella because Duo warned him about the rainy day. He got into the car and warmed up his classy Jeep.

The pilots had all met earlier some time and decided to have a nice reunion party. Of course Quatre had to get the supplies because they drew straws on who would buy the cake and Quatre grabbed the shortest straw. He thought it was rigged but he didn't really feel like arguing so he went anyway.

Duo sat upside-down on a couch staring at the rain through a window while Trowa was dozing off in his room upstairs. Wufei was reading a book, it was some old history book about World War 3. Heero was reading a Sailormoon manga, a classic in Japan. Duo got up and walked to the bathroom. Then the sound of sounds was heard, the doorbell. Everyone except Trowa got up and ran to the door with relief on their faces. Duo ran just when he was about to open the door to the bathroom. He pushed Wufei and Heero away and looked at the cake Quatre was holding and his face brightened. Then he turned and saw the cheese, it was beautiful and cheesy. He fell in love in an instant.

"The cheese is so lovely!"

The others fell in love too. "So cheesy!"

Everyone ate cake even the all too perfect cheese.

"So Mary Sue, where did you come from?" (Mary Sue is the cheese.)

"...."

Duo laughed at Mary Sue and stared dreamily at Mary Sue. Wufei got jealous and started performing tricks with his sword.

"..." The cheese replied.

"Ha! She likes me better!" Wufei said triumphantly.

Heero's heart softened at the cheesy creature. He fell in love for the first time in his life. Quatre told stories to the cheese.

"One time I fell into a lake and..."

Their hearts pounded as the cheesy creature spoke, "..."

They told the cheese that she had the most cheesy voice. "..." The cheese replied.

They drank soda until there wasn't anymore. (It didn't have caffeine because Quatre knows better.) There was laughter and sunshine despite the storm that now turned into a flood. Everyone was staring at the cheese lovingly.

When Trowa entered the kitchen, "Where's the cake?" He asked eagerly.

Everyone looked at him with guilty looks and snuck away. Trowa was angry that he didn't have any cake so he decided to make a sandwich he grabbed a knife and the cheese. He rose the knife into the air and slowly cut it in half. He grabbed two pieces of bread and spread mayonnaise on the pieces of bread. He put the cheese on one side of the bread and put the pieces of bread together. He walked into the living room and turned on the TV. Duo ran downstairs.

"Mary Sue? Mary Sue? Trowa do you know where she is?" Duo had a worried look on his face.

Trowa turned around and Duo spotted the almost-finished sandwich.

He screamed in horror and backed away from Trowa, "You cannibal! You are eating Mary Sue!"

Trowa looked confused, "What?"

Duo kept screaming.

"What?" Quatre, Wufei and Heero ran downstairs to see what happened. They all stared at Trowa with hateful stares except Quatre because he fainted.

"Was it something I said?"

They kept staring.

"What is it? Is it the cheese?"

Wufei spoke up, "How are you gonna live with your self now!?"

Trowa shrugged and kept watching TV.

Heero looked down, "How could you?"

Heero ran to couch and started choking Trowa.

"What the hell is wrong with you!" Trowa screamed as tried to push Heero away.

Quatre woke up.

Then the cheese spoke, "..."

They all look at each other.

"Maybe she's right we should get along with out her."

Quatre had tears in his eyes, "I will always think of you when I'm making a sandwich, farewell Mary Sue."

Quatre, Heero, Duo, and Wufei grabbed the sandwich and went to the toilet to have a funeral for Mary Sue. Trowa sat in living room sandwichless.

"….okay."

After mourning Mary Sue for about five minutes they all went upstairs and played video games while Trowa made another sandwich. And they lived happily ever after!

****

The End!


End file.
